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Modern Family Source is your fan connection to ABC's Modern Family, starring Ed O'Neill, Sofìa Vergara, Rico Rodriguez, Julie Bowen, Ty Burrell, Sarah Hyland, Ariel Winter, Nolan Gould, Jesse Tyler Ferguson, Eric Stonestreet and Aubrey Anderson-Emmons.
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Jun 10

Modern Family’s up for a Critic’s Choice Nominee, and what better way to celebrate the show’s nomination by re-living some of the things that make modern family so great – the classic one liners and moments of the show! If you want, please add your favorite moments and quotes in the comment section!

Mitchell: I know I’m not the handiest guy, but I’m still a man and I want to be able to look out into my yard and say, “There’s a little bit of me in that princess castle.”
Mitchell: Leave it to the gays to raise the only underachieving Asian in America.
Mitchell: You’re so gay you can’t even think of real girls names.


Alex: I’m just letting you guys know, I’m not taking care of him when you guys die.
Alex: If Haley got pregnant, would you ever pretend she got mono for a few months and then tell everyone the baby’s yours?
Alex: I guess what I’m trying to say is, “Don’t stop believing. Get this party started.”


Haley: Don’t feel. Just go splash water on your face and man up. We’re your mother now.
Haley: Look at him getting coffee and not putting chocolate in it! He’s so mature!
Haley [on her biggest fear]: Never getting my driver’s license, or getting one and the picture sucks.


Luke: Sorry I aggravated you, and just so you know, a lot of people think I’m adorable.
Luke: I brought you some soda, but I couldn’t find any straws, so you’ll have to drink it like cats.
Luke: When you walked through a spider web… when we were playing with a Ouija board and the wind blew a door shut…


Cam: Well, you’re pretending to be something you’re not, and boys do that for girls or really dreamy boys.
Cam: Richard Gere, I’ll be the officer, don’t be a gentleman.
Cameron: I’m like a big runaway charity truck and Mitchell is my off-ramp full of safety gravel.
Cameron: I’m like a mother bear. When I hear my cub crying, I have to run to her.


Phil:“My wife won’t let me go to Vegas.” Trust me that is not a phone call you want to make to a group of ex-college male cheerleaders. They will mock you with a hurtful rhythmic taunt.
Phil: It’s like they say, sometimes God closes a door, but sometimes he closes it so hard, you can’t get your wife out.
Phil: Angela Lansbury was the grand marshal. Good times she wrote.


Jay: I’m gonna walk like a man… right to that bar. That would be hilarious if you were familiar with Frankie Valli.
Jay: You know, when you get a massage, you sound like a Tijuana prostitute.
Jay: Was that before or after you were delivered to my door in a squad car wearing nothing but your underwear and a police hat.


Manny: I have a tennis racquet upstairs I only use as a bubble-bath frothier.
Manny: Tell me about it, I’ve got a clingy 5th grader, I can’t shake.
Manny: Don’t skimp on linens. Don’t compliment a teacher on her figure. And when it comes to my mom, never ask questions I don’t want the answers to.


Claire: Kids these days get trophies just for showing up. What’s that gonna lead to? A bunch of thirty year olds living at home.
Claire: Honey, look at how long it just took us to figure out she’s insulting us.
Claire: You can’t have two fun parents… You know that kid Liam who wears pajama pants to school and pays for things with a hundred-dollar bill? Two fun parents.


Gloria: I love Manny, but sometimes, I…be a boy. Go outside kick a ball and steal something.
Gloria: He scared the baby cheeses out of me!
Gloria: In my culture, mothers are very clingy to their sons. In fact, the leading cause of death among Colombian women is when their sons get married. But I’m not like that.


« Modern Family – 6 Critic Choice Nominations | Will Modern Family Recast Baby Lily? Plus, What Are Cam and Mitchell’s Plans for Kiddo No. 2? »
  • Prakhar

    In Season 2 episode 4, Strangers On A Treadmill..
    That act of Mitchell, “You never heard of troga..” while on treadmill with Clair and Claire’s response to his habit of saying things like that ..and then he again do the same thing later in their conversation..WAS TOTALLY FUNNY. I do this same thing..always that people do my impression starting with “you never heard this song or movie…”